Sunday, April 1, 2012

Life as a mother

So it's been a few months short of a year since I've wrote in my blog. I apologise to my four followers. Yes, me included. I think it's so easy to put things like this on the back burner when you are the mom of two very young babies.

Bringing us all up to date will surely be a good place to start. I left off with my son around the 9 month old mark and my daughter just over 2 years old. They are now 1.5 and just 3 respectively. Looking back on the past several months it's actually not a surprise that I didn't write. Ok this is not true. I wrote quite a few drafts half worked on but never posted. I may go through them and see if there was anything interesting to re-visit but alas those mangled thoughts haven't been added to Cyber Space.

I also have the excuse of several added stressors on top of general parenthood that may have something do to with my lack of time to write. There has been a fun but also very trying trip to Europe with the kiddies in tow, a sale of one of our properties, a purchase of a new property 6000 something kilometres away, extensive house renovations in our current home so we can afford the upcoming move which is going to literally bring us across the country. The hubby also took a new job working in the US of A and is gone for a month at a time with 2 weeks in between to come home. Needless to say all busy times of life for the average family and more challenging with two mini daredevils in tow.

There also has been a very recent shift in the way I’m looking at parenthood and in fact my own life since the last blog.  When reading the last entry I can hear the stress in my tone and the internal mental struggle I was denying that I was having. There are still elements of that struggle that sometimes emerge daily but it’s no longer a so called “elephant in the room.”

Several months ago my very good friend and I were talking about how it felt to be a child. The freedom and lack of stress, the enjoyment and wonderment of life, the pureness. We both said that we would be ecstatic if we could feel like that again. What I recently realized that through my own children and watching them grow and learn and go through those feelings of wonderment you can bring yourself back to those feelings if you just go with it. You do what you can to the best of your abilities and let go of the guilt of trying to be the perfect parent. You can not protect your children from stress and the struggle of the world but you can try to make it a better place by being there along side them for the ride and try to guide them through the tough times.

The life of a mother is not normally a relaxed place, it’s not a stress free place, it’s definitely NOT a quiet place, but it’s a good place. It’s a place that one should honour by enjoying it to the fullest and being there in the moment as often as possible.

1 comment:

  1. Well it's just not permissable for you to have a blog and not write anything in it. No matter how many kids you have under the age of three, nor cats, nor dogs, nor reno activities, nor anything else short of being a spirit who can no longer press the keys down hard enough. Hahahahahahahahahahahahaha...welcome back my love.